Folksy Ltd

The lies we tell our children

Just in the jewellery quarter with my business partner and her daughter. So far we’ve told Millie that the cafe has sold out of cake, that cress isn’t a vegetable and tastes like cheese so that she’d eat her sandwich, I’ve pretended to go for a wee so that she would go too and told her that her pet fish jelly came to live with me because she didn’t tidy her room (when in fact he died weeks ago and she only just noticed).
What lies have you told a child to get through the first day of the hols?

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It’s an oldie but a goodie… when the ice cream van is playing music they are all out of ice cream … hangs head in shame!

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Haha, I like these! Not recently, cause she’s now 25, but we always told our daughter that the car did not work unless everyone was buckled up.

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My daughter told my granddaughter last week that there were definitely No Mushrooms in the spag bol and even asked me to back her up. There were of course mushrooms in there just cut so small they couldn’t be identified.
I think I probably told my daughter the same when I used to make it for her !

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These are awesome :slight_smile: we also went with “santa is watching you” lol

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The ice cream van playing music was actually the fish van selling fish :frowning:

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I always told them that ice cream vans were a major source of salmonella… that always distracted them into a major round of questions.

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LOL!!! These are great. My mum and I once told my daughter that, if she didn’t eat her veg, she’d get the dreaded lurgi, which would make her break out in orange lumps that only grandma’s could see :expressionless:

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my mum and day used to tell me you would be curly hair if you are the crusts on bread. And that when putting eggshells in the compost if you don’t scrunch all the shell up witches would live in them.

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Our ice cream van was a musical van playing music for all the kids to enjoy.

I used to hide all sorts of veg in meals - my daughter started an honest food campaign when they noticed that the spag bol had pureed beetroot in it :smiley:

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I told an accidental lie. My niece came to stay for a week and her mum, my sister, warned at last minute that she had suddenly gone veggie (she still is 30 years on). I went out and bought lots of lovely veggie dishes including, eeer, picnic eggs.
Niece loved the eggs so much I bought more.
I never even considered what was between the breadcrumbs and the egg. :slight_smile:

She told her mum how good they were when she got home but my poor sister tried but failed to find any veggie picnic eggs and phoned to ask where I got them.
We never did tell her she’d eaten sausage !

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Best not to, as a vegi myself I can honestly say if it was me I’d rather not know even thirty years on lol x

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You can nowadays buy quorn picnic eggs which are of course vegetarian.

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Yes but I can’t admit to what the one
s she ate were made of so can’t explain why I would tell her about the quorn ! :slight_smile:

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I have told my four children that there are tiny pin hole sized cameras around the house, called ‘pixie cams’ where the elves can see if they are being good or bad and report back to Santa! I have also said that when you become a parent, you are given the phone number of father Christmas. At this point, he doesn’t give you any presents, only your children. I have had to phone father Christmas before now to discus things about the antics of naughty boys. Hubby does a good Santa voice over the mobile from work! My 10 year old heard this the other week and said ‘I knew it! I knew he was real! My friends said he wasn’t, but it is true!’ How can I go back on any of this after years of tall tales and fibs??? I hang my head in shame…

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This thread is hilarious! I told my girls that Nanny McPhee was a personal friend of mine and I had her on speed dial just in case they were naughty :smiling_imp:

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