I love Christmas- but in December. I’m not one of those people who get all excited about it around now- and I don’t like seeing Christmas things in the shops just yet. But it’s around now when I start thinking about what I can get people.
I find it really difficult- especially at the moment as my husband is writing his PhD & we move house in a week we’re literally at our poorest- and it isn’t going to get any better before Christmas.
Mine & his family combined means 25 people buy for us- therefore we have 25 people to buy for.
We’re both creative people and enjoy making things where we can- as long as we know they will really like it (not just random rubbish for the sake of it) and some people that we find REALLY difficult to get for we’ll usually look to buy something.
I feel really guilty already because I know we aren’t going to be able to afford much for everyone- even though I know that’s not what Christmas is about- it’s still hard to shake the guilt when I hand over something tiny & handmade and someone hands me something expensive.
It’s these thoughts that sort of stress me out before Christmas.
I am going to spend some time looking on Folksy for gifts- though I have some awkward people to get for:
A relative who doesn’t like anything unless it has a designer name on it, a relative who’s very old, blind & deaf, another relative who never seems impressed with even really thoughtful gifts, 2 autistic relatives who have very limited interests, and now my 53 yr old mum who is now paralysed & has barely any hand movement living in a care home.
Fortunately I also have a lot of relatives who do enjoy handmade or little unique things and are therefore a lot of fun to buy/create for- but it’s the difficult ones that stress me out!!
Anyone else in a similar situation? What do you do? I sort of feel like I’ve exhausted all the good Christmas present ideas years ago.
I should think most people are getting exhausted of ideas. There’s only so many gadgets, gadget accessories and clothing items you can buy. With birthdays as well, I think they’ve got the lot now. I’m going with food for a lot of mine. After all, everyone has to eat. And you can get some great farmer’s market stuff from local shops now, so I’ll make up my own hampers tailored to their tastes
I feel for you. I haven’t started thinking about Christmas yet but I do only have close family to think about. My daughter loves handmade so I’ll be looking on here for a few things for her, Sister , even after all these years I’m not sure what she likes as she doesn’t give anything away at the time of receiving and my other half always says he doesn’t want anything but I always surprise him.
The trouble is these days people generally have a lot more disposable income than they used to. Gone are the days when you waited until Christmas or birthday for a book you wanted to read or the latest album from your favourite band. Even gadgets for the home tend to get bought when wanted rather than waiting to get them for a gift.
My extended family is not huge but large enough. My sister and I have discussed how to cut down on the Christmas expense and have decided to go down one of two routes - either limit all gifts to a maximum cost (£5, £10 or £15) per person or make it so that each person buys one large gift for one other person only (sort of like a secret santa) so that everyone receives one gift that they really want but only has to pay out for one gift each.
Not sure if its going to work but fingers crossed.
Sadly like @OrchardFelts said disposal income is the problem I seem to find. My brother is the worst for this where I have a idea next time I see him he has already purchased it
I’m a little old school were I will wait for something so someone can get it me.
I made lots of candles one year for friends which they loved.
I did start a thread on here over the weekend with gifts under £5 as me and my friends do that and want to get ahead this year (I hope )
My family decided many years ago that adults presents should be limited in price to around £10 each, so we don’t spend vast sums each year on things we don’t really need. We’ve done the charity-type gifts (goats etc) and often buy food & wine for the foodie-types, but mostly we stick to consumable or practical gifts. It’s amazing how many lovely things you can find for £10 when you try!
As far as ‘difficult’ relatives go, I have a couple of those, but I don’t worry about them at all - I try to buy something that I think they’ll like, but if they don’t, that’s really their problem, not mine! If they can’t appreciate the thought behind the gift, they really don’t deserve it anyway, and I don’t let it bother me.
I always struggle finding gifts. I think it’s because I go on a personal mission to find something so special & meaningful for everyone. Difficult when gifts on the high street tend to be the same year in year out.
I’m definitely buying more handmade this year as it’s much more special.
I tend to set a budget for gifts these days or else it can get extremely expensive.
Your responses have actually helped me feel a lot less guilty. So thank you!
You’re all right in terms of disposable income- people don’t wait for Christmas anymore they just get what they want- so when someone makes a hint in say July- I can’t assume they haven’t bought it for themselves before Christmas!
Thanks for the link to the £5 and under thread- will have a look.
I think I need to start thinking that fair enough- for my husband and our parents we’ll spend that bit more but for everyone else it’s going to have to be much less.
My husband and I usually decide on a budget each year for each of us, and it’s actually quite fun shopping within it- sometimes it means you have to be a bit more creative!!
Thanks folks- helpful as usual!! I felt silly posting this thread but glad I did now because if nothing else you’ve all just made me feel a bit better!
Once I’ve moved house I’m going to get looking on here & making a few bits and bobs for a couple of people.
The way I look at it is that I don’t often remember the gifts I was given at Christmases past, more the company and whether the day went well or not. Gift are lovely, but not the be all and end all of Christmas.
For people who don’t appreciate or understand handmade I tend to get cheap expensive items if you know what I mean- the best jams, tea, chocolate, soaps. For your relative who insists on a designer label, John Lewis have some lovely Georg Jenson stainless steel roundels for £10.
(If you have any family with pets Dandelion’s Gallery has some wonderful gifts at reasonable prices)
Haha yeah you’re right. Sadly I don’t remember everything I get each year. And I guess particularly for much older relatives who don’t really get out much anymore they kind of do like the same thing each year- especially if I got them something you know they particularly liked.
As much as I love Christmas Day and the week or 2 leading up to it- I’d happily celebrate it a lot less often. Haha
I’m glad I’m not the only one that scratches their head and begins to panic when Christmas starts to loom. The “disposable income” theory is so true (although that’s certainly not the case in our actual household, we add to our wish list throughout the year only to find relatives don’t want to pick from it lol). I try very hard to choose lovely, unique handmade gifts from Folksy and other sites but sadly often find they are not appreciated (a bottle of wine would usually get a better reception) … makes me wonder why I bother
Goodness, 25 is a lot! In our families presents have always been for immediate family only, everyone else just has a card. Nephews and nieces, for instance, have presents till 18, when they probably have more disposable income than the adults! I suspect that if you told some of your relatives that you were aiming for a simpler christmas this year, were going to cut down on the number of presents you were buying and would much prefer if they didn’t buy you anything in return, they’d actually breathe a sigh of releif as well!
I hate Christmas shopping this year. My mum hates handmade stuff, my sister is a craft maker so shes not so bad to get for, and my brother? Big pain because he wont let up what he wants for Christmas. So me? Im super stuck for Christmas and might just make a card and give money this year
Ours isn’t nieces & nephews (don’t have any thankfully).
It’s our parents, grandparents, aunts & siblings- & their partners. I would say everyone I buy for are close family. We spend more time with our siblings and their partners as we’re all in our 20’s & have plenty in common. Fortunately I only have one small person to buy for & for him I simply shop by age in a children’s shop so that’s pretty easy.
I spoke to my sister in law about not being able to afford much this Christmas & she is in the same position as they’re moving to London just after New Years- but we’ll all still sort of struggle to get things!! Haha
My husband & I thought about it yesterday- I think for the grandparents & aunts I’m going to make hand cream & bath bombs- I’ve made them before & they went down really well- plus they’re so cheap to make but look cool.
Got some other crafty ideas sort of in the making…and will buy a few more. Dad is getting his usual cheese/wine/nibbles hamper from our local deli! Haha
I love Christmas but Christmas shopping is a difficult one.
My sister is very fussy she loves smelly sets but only if they have an expensive name and don’t have lotions in.
Or if it’s anything else it has to be branded.
Her kids are no better. Don’t get me wrong love them to bits but they are so ungrateful.
I brought my older nephew turtle pj’s for his birthday he had the biggest hissing fit because they were a tiny bit to big.
Any toys just get chucked in a corner so this year I’m not really bothering.
I’ll get afew bits for friends but maybe clothes for my nephews. And vouchers for everyone else.
Sorry that sounds terrible.
I take older relatives out for the day, they seem to appreciate this much more than an actual gift. Afternoon tea, a trip to a local Christmas market, going to see a show at a local community theatre…there’s loads to do if you look carefully.
Aww that’s such a shame! I guess if the mum behaves in a certain way then it explains why her children do.
I don’t think I’d bother if my relatives behaved like that to be honest. At least if mine don’t like what they’ve been given they put on the show and act as though they do. Haha but going on like that about gifts would just totally take the fun out of it all. It’s not as though it’s a compulsory celebration so seems a shame.
My favourite part of Christmas is actually the few days before. I go with my husband and his family to a gorgeous farm shop in Northumberland where we pick up the turkey and plenty of other foody treats. Then we go for a walk around a pretty lake and feed the birds, then all go for a pub lunch. I love that day! I love Christmas Eve as well- that day is just for me & my husband- we go for a local walk around the seafront and lunch then spend the evening on the sofa watching Christmas films and eating yummy nibbles from the farm shop. Haha
It’s those days that I prefer to be honest!!
Honestly? I will buy for my parents and my children. And if my granddaughter has been born by then (due 30/12) I’ll buy for her. My partner and I will exchange small but meaningful gifts. That’s it. We are estranged from his family, and my brothers and I gave up long ago buying presents for each other. There was never a great deal of money around when I was growing up (and to be honest there still isn’t). I’d rather focus on not incurring additional debt, and having a nice relaxing time.
Yeah I’d much rather that too- that makes sense to me. I’m definitely going to scale back this year. All but one of the people we get for are adults- so they should understand that! Haha…I guess we’ll see come Dec 25th.
I do love buying (or making) for people though- I very rarely get myself anything as I really don’t enjoy shopping- I will only buy what I need & even then I’ll try & do it online, but when it comes to other people I like mooching around cute little shops for something a bit different. I guess I will still do that- but with a much smaller budget- and thanks to everyone’s comments, less of the guilt too.
